Download Learning From Divorce: How to Take Responsibility, Stop the by Christie Coates, Robert LaCrosse PDF

By Christie Coates, Robert LaCrosse

Studying from Divorce, by way of Christine A. Coates and E. Robert LaCrosse, is a realistic e-book to help you rid your self of damaging emotions of guilt and fear and substitute them with confident emotions of progress and desire. studying from Divorce will help you confront your fears and flaws, inspire you to maneuver ahead towards switch, advance practical hopes approximately succeeding with destiny relationships, and switch your mess ups into victories!In this groundbreaking booklet the authors clarify that divorce may be considered as a developmental procedure, a interval of transformation and progress. they assist the reader comprehend why the divorce occurred within the first position— how unrealistic expectancies of an everlasting honeymoon or a companion who might fulfill their childish wishes and clear up all their adolescence difficulties have so usually resulted in immature and self-centered habit. as opposed to this perspective, studying from Divorce presents the reader with a extra practical view of marriage as a long term dedication requiring loyalty, compromise, devotion, perseverance, and selflessness. This e-book indicates that the rewards of affection and kin exceed such a lot the other pleasure or aspiration in one's lifestyles and should assist you.

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Extra resources for Learning From Divorce: How to Take Responsibility, Stop the Blame, and Move On

Sample text

She guessed what had happened because she was well aware of the predatory nature of her friend who wore it. A confrontation ensued, and a separation quickly followed when Philip admitted to the affair. In therapy, Philip admitted to numerous affairs, many of which he carried on simultaneously. He even had a Rolodex in which he kept track, for instance, of which woman got what kind of flower from him on Valentine’s Day. He feared that if he did not write this sort of information down he would ask one girlfriend how she liked the roses when he had in fact given her daisies.

Peter found himself intensely attracted to Samantha. He was surprised at himself because she came from a background that was similar to his, one he was angry at for its rules. Samantha pointed out to him in one of their all-night marathon “Let’s get to know each other” sessions that he seemed hung up on the rules of his parents’ social class, but had he thought about the values? Her comment opened a door for Peter. “I realized that I was throwing out the baby with the bathwater. My parents were very controlling through their rules for everything.

This pattern of behavior continued through his three marriages. Each time, once he married he was looking out for the next lover. By the time he came to therapy he was filled with self-loathing. He realized he was using women and hurting them, but he could not stop. The thrill was in the hunt, and the woman offering herself to him helped convince him that he was loveable. He had no internal way of generating a personal knowledge that he was loveable, and he always had to rely on sources outside himself for reassurance.

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